Guys, I love you. But even those of you who are deeply aware of women’s issues in the wider culture (and my friends all are, they have hearts the size of a whole continent), sometimes seem to be unaware of what it’s like to be a woman in a conservative Bible-believing faith community.
Which is as it should be, to some extent, I suppose, since you’re men.
But, my beloved friends, you have a charge to keep. I hope you’ll bear with me, and find some encouragement for your great responsibilities, and hold me accountable without dismissing my thoughts, and listen deeply.
Being the Majority
When I’m the white North American woman at the evangelical publishing conference, I’m oblivious to the challenges being experienced by the male minority. I’m oblivious to the challenges being experienced by the black and Asian female minority. I have only the slightest understanding, as a Canadian, of the challenges being experienced by the attendees from overseas cultures that operate very differently than the American business culture.
Let a man regard us in this manner, as servants of Christ and stewards of the mysteries of God. In this case, moreover, it is required of stewards that one be found trustworthy….I am conscious of nothing against myself, yet I am not by this acquitted.
1 Cor. 4:1-2, 4a
When we get to a place where we’re reacting to secular reactionism, we’re almost guaranteed to have hermeneutical issues. A.W. Tozer famously said that the historic role of the church has been proactive, one of speaking into the world, that the world may respond to its Creator and Redeemer; it has only been in the last hundred years of Western Christianity that the church has abdicated its calling and become a responder to the world, founding its responses on the premises and biases of secular society.
Well, I’m paraphrasing to some extent. But the point remains.
Do men and women have inherently different emotional constitutions? I think it’s fair to say they do, but the older I get, the more I am aware that we’re all people with the same kind of heart. We do have differing social responses, and we do have different natural expressions of the same heart. Sorting out which is which, though…aye, there’s the rub. 
And the same goes for gender doctrines. But there’s more at work here than the wrong tools for a job; there’s the pressure and presuppositions unique to North American society’s social liberty and its economics.
Let us proceed with some anecdotes. This is not an analytical post, just a collection of personal experiences for context.
As a new Christian, it was easy to embrace a theological teaching that men and women are inherently different. I was fresh from an upbringing where, in the abstract at least, gender was considered largely an environmental construct, and from a family where I saw the women ruling the roosts, often to the detriment of their daily relationships. Somewhere along the way, I came to an unspoken decision that I wouldn’t ever marry a man I could rule–because I knew I simply wouldn’t be able to respect a pushover.
That wasn’t about gender ideology. It was about how human relationships function.