Open thy mouth, judge righteously, and plead the cause of the poor and needy.
Who can find a virtuous woman? for her price is far above rubies.

~Prov. 31:9-10

As I work through these verses, it’s been helpful to distill the basic thrust of the teachings I’ve heard on them. What follows is a general summary of what I’ve seen said or implied, and then a revisit to the passage to look at it in its context.

None of this negates the basic understanding that this is the kind of wife the king was exhorted to look for. But in context, we see exhortation to both parties of the ruling marriage to be free and equal partners in ensuring the kingdom’s stability. As well, we do have to consider the trickle-down effect of the greater culture being guided by the personal culture of the royal family. Within my lifetime, Princess Diana defined popular thinking. A culture built around monarchy is one of personal identification between people and a lifetime regent, with familial ties that extend outward in ever-widening circles down to the most common levels of society.

Who can find a virtuous woman?

American fundamentalist version:

These women don’t really exist, but you, little woman, should try your best to attain this unachievable standard in hopes that you won’t totally fail to measure up to the “biblical womanhood” bar. It probably won’t work, because actual biblical women are so rare, but try not to be a dishonour to your husband.

Conversely, oh my, the star status conferred on any woman who can pull off the appearance of Proverbs womanhood! The closer a woman gets to fitting into the “list” of traits, the more cultic pull she commands among followers. Hence the high value within dysfunctional churches, where the “right” woman acts as a tool for her spouse in leadership to enhance and maintain control over the congregation.

Contextual interpretation:

Here is the front line of battle in defending the rights of the afflicted and needy. O king, when you see a woman like this, she’s worth more to your nation than all the jewels of your treasury. Actively seek these women and plead their cause. Are rubies nonexistent? No, they’re high-investment. But worth it. Think about that.

Her worth is far above rubies.

American fundamentalist version:

This woman is a commodity to be produced (through training which mines her personhood for the “right” traits) and bartered (courtship, extreme patriarchy) as chattel in her family’s control and possession.

Contextual interpretation:

Listen up, O king, because Mamma is about to lay it on you why you want to look out for this kind of citizen. What does she do for the land? Let me tell you, point by point…

The heart of her husband trusts in her,
And he will have no lack of gain.
She does him good and not evil
All the days of her life.

~Prov. 31:11-12

American fundamentalist version:

The heart of her husband trusts that he can exploit her talents, skills and knowledge for his own gain, and she will fade into the background without ever taking credit, regardless of what her dreams may be. She allows him to do this, because otherwise, she would be “doing him evil.” This pattern is systemic, holding sway over “all the days of her life.”

What a recipe for creating and sustaining mediocre and functionally retarded men.

Contextual interpretation:

Gross domestic product. Women who command equal power, trust and respect in their most intimate personal relationships bring stability to the workforce and the economy.

Because of her focus on relational care toward him (“she does him good and not evil”), the two of them become intertwined on a family path of security and productivity, thus functioning to short-circuit excessive debt, poor decision-making, peer exploitation (doing so or being the recipient of it) and other hazards men run into regarding financial management. The king himself has been duly warned about lifestyle issues which contribute to the crumbling of social order.

I have an old margin note on these verses, scribbled in blue ink. It says, “God’s ‘gain’ is different than man’s.”

What does it profit a man, if he gain the whole world, but lose his own soul?